The Bible places a strong emphasis on the sanctity of marriage and the responsibilities that come with it, particularly the treatment of one’s spouse. Mistreating a wife is not only harmful to the marital relationship but also a violation of God’s design for marriage, which calls for love, respect, and honor between husband and wife. The following verses offer guidance on how husbands should treat their wives, highlighting the consequences of mistreatment and the blessings of a loving, respectful relationship. Here are 30 Bible verses about mistreating your wife, each accompanied by a brief commentary to provide deeper understanding and reflection.
1. Ephesians 5:25
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.”
Sacrificial love. Paul calls husbands to love their wives with the same self-sacrificial love that Christ showed for the church. This verse sets a high standard for marital love, emphasizing that mistreating a wife is contrary to the selfless love that should characterize a Christian marriage.
2. 1 Peter 3:7
“Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.”
Honoring your wife. Peter instructs husbands to treat their wives with understanding and honor. Mistreating a wife can hinder a husband’s spiritual life, including his prayers, indicating the seriousness with which God views the treatment of one’s spouse.
3. Colossians 3:19
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.”
Avoiding bitterness. Paul urges husbands to love their wives without harboring bitterness. This verse warns against letting resentment or harshness damage the marital relationship, reminding husbands to cultivate a loving and forgiving heart.
4. Malachi 2:14
“Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant.”
Faithfulness in marriage. God condemns the mistreatment of a wife, particularly in terms of unfaithfulness or betrayal. This verse highlights that God witnesses the covenant of marriage and holds husbands accountable for how they treat their wives.
5. Proverbs 18:22
“He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord.”
Value of a wife. This verse emphasizes the blessing that a wife is to her husband. Mistreating a wife is a failure to recognize the favor and blessing that God has provided through the marital relationship.
6. Genesis 2:24
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
Unity in marriage. This foundational verse on marriage stresses the deep unity between husband and wife. Mistreating a wife is an affront to this unity, as it harms the relationship that is meant to be characterized by love and mutual respect.
7. Proverbs 31:10-11
“Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain.”
Trust and value. This passage from Proverbs speaks of the high value and trust a husband should place in his wife. Mistreating her undermines the trust and diminishes the recognition of her worth.
8. Ecclesiastes 9:9
“Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life which He has given you under the sun; all your days of vanity; for that is your portion in life, and in the labor which you perform under the sun.”
Joy in marriage. This verse encourages husbands to live joyfully with their wives, seeing them as a gift in life. Mistreating a wife robs the marriage of joy and contradicts the enjoyment and partnership that God intends for marriage.
9. 1 Corinthians 7:3
“Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.”
Affection and duty. Paul instructs husbands to fulfill their duty of affection towards their wives. Mistreating a wife, particularly through neglect or lack of affection, is a failure to meet the mutual obligations of love and care in marriage.
10. Proverbs 12:4
“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones.”
Respect and honor. This proverb describes an excellent wife as a crown, symbolizing honor and respect. Mistreating a wife devalues her and the honor she brings to the marriage, leading to shame and dysfunction in the relationship.
11. Hebrews 13:4
“Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”
Honor in marriage. This verse underscores the honor and purity that should characterize marriage. Mistreating a wife through infidelity or other forms of dishonor is subject to God’s judgment, highlighting the seriousness of maintaining integrity in the marital relationship.
12. Song of Solomon 4:9
“You have ravished my heart, my sister, my spouse; you have ravished my heart with one look of your eyes, with one link of your necklace.”
Love and admiration. This verse from the Song of Solomon expresses deep love and admiration for one’s spouse. Mistreating a wife stands in stark contrast to the loving devotion and admiration that should be present in a marriage.
13. Ephesians 5:28
“So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.”
Self-love and care. Paul equates loving one’s wife with loving oneself, as the two are one flesh. Mistreating a wife is not only harmful to her but also to the husband himself, as it disrupts the unity and well-being of the marriage.
14. Matthew 19:6
“So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Protecting marital unity. Jesus teaches about the inseparability of marriage, emphasizing the unity that God establishes between husband and wife. Mistreating a wife undermines this unity and goes against God’s design for marriage.
15. 1 Corinthians 11:11
“Nevertheless, neither is man independent of woman, nor woman independent of man, in the Lord.”
Interdependence in marriage. Paul highlights the mutual dependence between husband and wife within the context of their relationship with the Lord. Mistreating a wife disregards this interdependence, leading to an unhealthy and unbalanced relationship.
16. 1 Timothy 5:8
“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
Provision and care. Paul stresses the importance of providing for one’s family, particularly within the household. Mistreating a wife, especially through neglect or failure to provide, is a denial of the basic responsibilities of a husband and is condemned as being worse than unbelief.
17. Malachi 2:16
“For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one’s garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. Therefore take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.”
God’s disdain for mistreatment. This verse speaks against the treachery of divorce, particularly when it involves mistreatment of a spouse. God’s strong language against divorce and mistreatment highlights the seriousness with which He views the sanctity and care of the marital relationship.
18. Song of Solomon 2:16
“My beloved is mine, and I am his. He feeds his flock among the lilies.”
Belonging and commitment. This verse reflects the deep sense of belonging and commitment between husband and wife. Mistreating a wife violates this sense of mutual belonging and the loving care that should characterize a marriage.
19. Ephesians 5:33
“Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
Mutual love and respect. Paul emphasizes the importance of both love from the husband and respect from the wife. Mistreating a wife disrupts this balance, leading to a breakdown in the mutual love and respect that should define the marriage.
20. Proverbs 5:18-19
“Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. As a loving deer and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times; and always be enraptured with her love.”
Rejoicing in marriage. This verse encourages husbands to find joy and satisfaction in their marriage. Mistreating a wife destroys the joy and love that should be nurtured in the relationship, leading to dissatisfaction and discord.
21. Matthew 5:28
“But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Faithfulness in thought and action. Jesus warns against even the thought of adultery, highlighting the importance of faithfulness in marriage. Mistreating a wife through unfaithfulness, whether in thought or deed, betrays the trust and purity that should characterize the marital bond.
22. 1 Peter 3:1-2
“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.”
Influence through conduct. While this verse addresses wives, it underscores the importance of mutual respect and godly conduct in marriage. Mistreating a wife can hinder her ability to fulfill her role in the marriage and disrupts the spiritual harmony intended by God.
23. Proverbs 31:28-29
“Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all.'”
Praising your wife. This passage highlights the honor and praise a husband should give to his wife. Mistreating a wife deprives her of the affirmation and encouragement she deserves, leading to a strained and unhappy marriage.
24. Deuteronomy 24:5
“When a man has taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war or be charged with any business; he shall be free at home one year, and bring happiness to his wife whom he has taken.”
Bringing happiness to your wife. This Old Testament law emphasizes the importance of a husband’s role in making his wife happy, particularly in the early stages of marriage. Mistreating a wife is directly opposed to this principle, causing harm instead of nurturing happiness.
25. Titus 2:4-5
“That they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.”
Loving and nurturing. While this verse speaks to wives, it emphasizes the reciprocal nature of love and care in marriage. Mistreating a wife damages the relationship and hinders the ability of both spouses to fulfill their God-given roles.
26. Proverbs 14:1
“The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands.”
Supporting your wife’s efforts. This proverb highlights the role of a wise woman in building her household. Mistreating a wife, particularly by undermining her efforts, is destructive to the household and contrary to the wisdom and support that should be present in a marriage.
27. Matthew 19:8
“He said to them, ‘Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.'”
God’s original design. Jesus reminds that divorce was allowed due to the hardness of human hearts, not because it was part of God’s original design for marriage. Mistreating a wife, leading to divorce or separation, is a departure from God’s intent for a loving, lifelong partnership.
28. Exodus 21:10
“If he takes another wife, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, and her marriage rights.”
Providing for your wife. This law from Exodus emphasizes the husband’s responsibility to provide for his wife’s needs. Mistreating a wife by neglecting her basic needs is a serious violation of the marital covenant.
29. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
“Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
The essence of love. Paul’s famous description of love outlines the qualities that should be present in marriage. Mistreating a wife violates these principles, especially the calls to kindness, patience, and selflessness, which are essential for a loving and healthy marriage.
30. Luke 6:31
“And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise.”
The golden rule in marriage. This verse, often referred to as the Golden Rule, applies to all relationships, including marriage. Mistreating a wife is a failure to treat her as one would want to be treated, and it undermines the mutual respect and care that should define the marital bond.
These verses collectively underscore the importance of treating one’s wife with love, respect, and honor. Mistreating a wife not only harms the marital relationship but also disrupts the spiritual harmony intended by God in marriage. By embracing these biblical principles, husbands can foster a healthy, loving, and God-honoring marriage.
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